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"A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic."
"A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul."
"A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."
"A man learns to skate by staggering about making a fool of himself; indeed, he progresses in all things by making a fool of himself."
"A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell."
"An Irishman's heart is nothing but his imagination."
"Be like the sun and meadow, which are not in the least concerned about the coming winter."
"Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world."
"Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve."
"England and America are two countries separated by a common language."
"Even the youngest of us may be wrong sometimes."
"Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough."
"He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches."
"Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from history."
"Home life as we understand it is no more natural to us than a cage is to a cockatoo."
"Human beings are the only animals of which I am thoroughly and cravenly afraid."
"I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a fiend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize."
"I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation."
"If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion."
"If you can't get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance."
"Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine and at last you create what you will."
"It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid."
"Liberty means responsibility. That's why most men dread it."
"Martyrdom... is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability."
"One man that has a mind and knows it can always beat ten men who haven't and don't."
"Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it."
"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them."
"Reading made Don Quixote a gentleman. Believing what he read made him mad."
"Some men see things as they are and ask why. Others dream things that never were and ask why not."
"Some men see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say, why not?"
"Take the utmost trouble to find the right thing to say, and then say it with the utmost levity."
"The golden rule is that there are no golden rules."
"The joy in life is to be used for a purpose. I want to be used up when I die."
"The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time."
"The man who writes about himself and his own time is the only man who writes about all people and all time."
"The moment we want to believe something, we suddenly see all the arguments for it, and become blind to the arguments against it."
"The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is."
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."
"There are two tragedies in life. One is not to get your heart's desire. The other is to get it."
"There is no love sincerer than the love of food."
"Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything."
"Use your health even to the point of wearing it out. That is what it is for. Spend all you have before you die, and do not outlive yourself."
"We don't bother much about dress and manners in England, because as a nation we don't dress well and we've no manners."
"What is life but a series of inspired follies? The difficulty is to find them to do. Never lose a chance: it doesn't come every day."
"When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty."
"When I was a young man I observed that nine out of every ten things I did were failures. I didn't want to be a failure. So I did ten times more work."
"You are going to let the fear of poverty govern your life and your reward will be that you will eat, but you will not live."
"You don't learn to hold your own in the world by standing on guard, but by attacking and getting well hammered yourself."
"Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children."
"The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity."